We all have times were things become very difficult. That has been me the last few weeks. I confonted my wife about the distance that was forming in our lives. To my surprise she wanted to leave. How did this happen? Where did things go wrong? Did i do something? Was she doing something behind my back? All these questions and many more ran through my hand in the next few days. Things got rough, i couldnt eat, couldnt sleep, found no peace. All i could do was wonder what had happened. Through several conversations that upset my wife, and myself as well, i began to learn.

I learned first that she was upset with me for how i treated her and the kids. Since she has pointed out what i have done i can see what she speaks of. I have a habit to be selfish, even in conversation. I tend to manipulate things to what i want. If i cant get what i want i tend to belittle or pull down. Things between us have not grown much better so far. However, i believe in the power of God and Love.

I have made a promise to one of her family members to work on this marriage. Basically I am to take a set course of action on a daily basis, building upon what i learn from each day. This is designed to create a change in myself, a lasting change that will forever change my future. However, my wife still holds strong to her belief that God cannot help us, therapy cannot help us, and there is no way i can change, and stay changed. The joy of God is that he has given us each free will. The problem with free will is sometimes people choose what they believe is right for them at that time, and learn later that things are so much harder.

The lesson here is that we should avoid situations like these. Perhaps others can learn from my difficulties. Do not take your marriage for granted. Each day get up and make a choice to love your spouse and children. Do something every day to make them appreciate you, but dont do expecting something return. Do it simply for no other reason but love. Learn and follow through with this and your life will change, and if your marriage could change forever as well.